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All American Horror Story Love Making Sex Scenes, Ranked

May 10, 2019
10 min read

American Horror Story‘ is regarded as one of the creepiest horror shows to have come out in recent times. It’s not just any other horror show that reminds you of those gory slasher flicks like ‘Nightmare on Elm Street’ and it’s not even one of those typical Japanese paranormal adaptations like ‘The Ring’. In fact, ‘AHS’ doesn’t make any deliberate attempt to scare the viewers. Instead, it slowly builds up the suspense and maintains a creepy atmosphere that defines its tone. ‘Psycho’ is still considered to be one of the best horror flicks in the history of cinema and it nowhere has these typical jump scares you see in horror flicks these days. All it has is an intriguing, suspense-filled build up that gets underneath your skin. The same is true for this show. It sends shivers down your spine and does not relent for a second.

Even when it comes down to the sex scenes of the show, it’s unlike anything you’ve ever seen before. What comes to your mind when you think of disturbing, weird sex scenes? Bestiality, necrophilia, or maybe incest? Well, ‘American Horror Story’ shows all of this and goes even further. There are a few scenes here and there that are slightly normal and involve pleasure rather than pain. But for the most part of it, the sex scenes are extremely weird. So, here’s the list of hottest ‘American Horror Story’ scenes.

12. Adam Levine and His Haunted Honeymoon (EP02 SE01)

Couples these days have all kinds of weird fantasies and normal sex has just become too boring. And it’s shows like these that inspire such ideas. Adam Levine and his bride just don’t get the kicks from your typical tropical honeymoon vacations. Instead of making love in a beach house that’s somewhere on a beautiful island, they go to a haunted house for their honeymoon. This is scene that raises a series of questions in your head and the biggest one is — what the hell is Adam Levine even doing here? But soon after that, you’re distracted by his lack of foreplay and his use of his spit for lube. Once upon a time, a man who was announced as the sexiest man alive is now in the least sexy lovemaking scene ever made; talk about dropping the ball there! But the scene soon comes to an end when Adam’s hand is ripped right off by a monster in the house and we are put out of our miseries. Who knew watching a celebrity getting his arm ripped off would be more pleasing to the eyes than a sex scene?!

11. Throwback to the 60s (SE02 EP04)

Interracial relationships were a taboo back in the 60s and that’s why Alma and Kit keep their marriage a secret. They are young and life is good for them. It’s just a normal day where Kit (Evan Peters) returns home and finds Alma cooking up some roast. The two are madly in love and it can be clearly seen in the eyes. They start off by kissing each other and then soon end up making some sweet love in the bedroom, leaving the roast to burn in the kitchen. This is a very normal sex scene for ‘AHS’ standards and is in fact quite steamy. However, soon after this beautiful sex scene, Alma gets abducted by aliens and the depressingly scary tone of the show is back.

10. Desperate Inmate Sex (SE02 EP10)

Kit is sent to prison for the murder of his wife after she disappears with the aliens and this is where he meets Grace, who is another inmate sentenced to the Briarcliff Manor for killing her abusive father. Both of them know that they don’t deserve to be there, but life has just been unfair to them. They find temporary solace wrapped in each other’s arms on top of the kitchen counter. Clearly, no one cares about health care violations here at this prison and the two get a temporary escape from their dreadful lives.

9. Infertility Sex Ritual (SE03 EP03)

As weird as the title of this sex scene might sound, it is actually not all that bad. Cordiella Foxx and her husband Hank seem to face some problems lately with conceiving a child. But who cares for a doctor when you know witchcraft, right? Cordiella sets up a perfect witchy ritual environment for them to have sex and they make some tender love right in the middle of a circle of fire. This scene is straight out of a romance film and even turns you on a little. The two do make love like a real couple but soon after this, it is revealed that Josh has been cheating on his wife all this while.

8. A Threesome With the Dead (SE03 EP07)

Madison, played by Emma Roberts, is one bitchy witch who ends up killing the crush of her fellow witch named Zoe. Madison soon realizes that Zoe is struggling to cope up with the death of Kyle (Evan Peters). So she decides to bring him back to life using a spell. This leads to a love triangle and soon, we see the three in bed together. This scene again isn’t all that bad but what makes it weird is that Kyle is kind of a zombie. Still, we somehow learn to live with that. Soon after this, Madison gets really jealous and refuses to save the life of her friend Zoe and this is when Kyle is forced to kill her. Madison clearly did all this for nothing and in the end, proved that no matter how strong your magical powers are, love is one thing that can still hurt the hell out of you.

7. Tupperware Party (SE04 EP10)

Jimmy Darling is known as the lobster boy at the circus he works in. After this scene, we’re pretty sure that many women just assumed that Evan Peters is amazing with his hands (if you know what I mean!). He not only uses his “lobster claws” for Elsa’s show but runs a side business where he pleasures lonely housewives with his human vibrator hands. The ladies get together for a “Tupperware party” but deep inside, they’re just dying to wait for their turn to visit the back room where Jimmy works the magic. As a viewer, you literally get to see what goes on in the backroom as we see a lady entering and is asked to lie down and relax by Jimmy. He slips his claw-like hands inside her dress and she starts crying out with pleasure. As confusing as this may seem, your hormones will surely react to this in one way or the other.

6. Bubble Bath With Lady Gaga (SE05 EP04)

Elizabeth (Lady Gaga), the vampire queen of the Cortez Hotel, starts getting sick of her lover (Matt Bomer), who just sits in his room and watches ‘House of Cards’ instead of going out and hunting. This is when she meets the bad boy model at the hotel and is just not able to resist the urge to transform him. She gives in to the temptation and the two end up having sex in a coffin-shaped bathtub. If you compare this scene with the other Lady Gaga sex scenes, then this one probably stands nowhere in the competition. It’s the least freaky out of all and you will soon know why.

5. Lady Gaga and Matt Bomer Reunite (SE05 EP02)

The two vamp lovers reunite and their old feelings start to surface. All of this escalates quickly and leads to Elizabeth having some makeup sex with her old flame (Matt Bomer). This scene has no fancy makeup, no funky looking costumes, nothing exceptionally kinky and no weird sex positions. It might even come off as a little boring because it’s just so mainstream. But it is ranked higher than most because being as simple as it may be, it gives you something refreshing compared to all the other insane, disturbing sex scenes.

4. Ancient Gay Sex (SE06 EP05)

Before ‘American Horror Story’, Evan Peters was only known for his side roles in movies like ‘Never Back Down’ or his role as Quicksilver in ‘X-Men.’ But after his performance in the first few seasons of ‘AHS’, fans were just dying to see him again. The producers probably took this as a cue and after all the anticipation, they brought him back in season 6. What surprises the fans is the fact that he is now a gay man named Edward Phillippe, who first built the “Matt and Shelby Home” in the early 1700s. It turns out that Edward has left his wife, family and everything else behind just to fulfill his pleasures of love with his valet. This leads to not just one but quite a few steamy scenes between the two. Evan Peters surely came back with a bang and surprisingly, this time, did not get killed in the first few minutes. He eventually does meet a gruesome end but not a single soul complained because his return itself, especially with this new gay role, was enough to keep everyone satisfied.

3. Minotaur Love (SE03 EP01)

Season 3 is undoubtedly the wildest out of all the seasons and it proves that right from the beginning. ‘Coven’ sets the pace for the rest of the season by starting off with an unforgettable episode; unforgettable because this is unlike anything you have ever seen before. The rebellious and intelligent Queenie finds herself in the same room as the vicious half man half bull Minotaur. Anyone would be scared to death even by the mere sight of that creature but not Queenie. She instead sweet-talks to this dreaded creature and says: “You just wanted love, and that makes you a beast. They call me that too, but that’s not who we are.” After these sweet words, the Minotaur, as you’d expect, gets carried away. He proceeds to have sex with her and once he’s done, Queenie is almost left dead. But what was she even expecting out of something so bizarre? This one scene left everyone shocked, but it also prepares you for the other unearthly sex scenes that lie ahead in the ‘Coven’.

Read More: Best House of Cards Sex Scenes

2. Elsa’s Erotic History (SE04 EP13)

A new character named Elsa steps in the “Freakshow” season. No one has a clue who she is or why the bottom halves of her legs are missing. Everything about her is soon revealed but one should know that this is not for the faint-hearted. The show takes us to a long flashback that shows Elsa was once upon a time a dominatrix in Germany and one of her extreme practices involved forcing her clients to sit on nails every time they had to use the washroom. But what makes this flashback even more disturbing is the story of her losing her legs. Apparently, her dominatrix clients had chopped off her legs for the sake of a snuff film they were making. Twisted, unpleasant and nasty are three words that very well define this flashback.

Read More: Best ‘Orange is the New Black’ Sex Scenes

1. A Bloody Orgy (SE05 EP01)

‘American Horror Story’ becomes a part of the “orgy club” along with other shows like ‘Sense 8’ and ‘Westworld‘. Elizabeth (Lady Gaga) and her lover (Matt Bomer) go out on a not-your-typical date night. They pick up another couple at a movie festival and take them back to a hotel room. But midway through, Elizabeth and Donovan start feeding on the blood of the couple and that makes this one the gnarliest sex moment of the show. It is epic in its own way because it proves that the show does not hesitate when it comes to taking gore to a whole new level.

Read More: Best Game of Thrones Sex Scenes

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